A really important day

Today is a really important day. It is also a very difficult day. Life has a habit of being a confusing mess like this, and if I had a say in it I’d like it to be otherwise, but sadly I do not. This is the short version: I have this friend who, when she…


Go Away

I didn’t do anything today, and all my thoughts are rotten. I’m claiming moral victory for not actively self sabotaging, but I don’t need you judging me. eff off.


Names for the Nameless

Continuing on from previous threads [threads as metaphor for ongoing brain activity presents an interesting visual when I ruminate on it] this is the pre-amble Let me give some context.  I used to have a chromebook, which is to say that there is an unused chromebook in my apartment, but it is unused due to…


Silent All These…

…months? [apologies to Tori] “You need that external motivation,” my therapist said yesterday.  I agreed. “There is no internal, well, anything. Just ain’t there.”  If I am not reminded of the dropped balls, I don’t even see them.  Not unless they are the ones that trip me. I bought a chromebook during Prime Day (it…


Lost and Found (for a given value of ‘lost’)

  “You should have a creative outlet.”   This is not a particularly profound insight, nor would anybody involved expect it to be interpreted as such. But such as things are, sometimes stating the obvious is merited, and I cannot argue with the message, or the delivery. My patterns are stale, and my awareness of…


club house

Old business:   February apparently happened.  I was there for part of it. New business:  Lets talk about old things.   When I was a kid, I wanted a cool clubhouse.  My mother read books to us, often the Three Investigators mysteries, and I later took up reading them myself. Their secret junkyard lair is…


Strangers without candy

At the end of last week, some people on the street asked me to get into their van, and I did. Maybe it’s just been too long since those safety seminars and scare videos in grade school.  Or maybe I’ve just given up and was throwing myself, along with caution, to the wind. Or another…


Longlasting Freshness

It is 2015.   A new year, still with that new year smell.  A little past the halfway mark of January, and all those diets are fading, the ellipticals at the gym are emptying out; renewal gradually settles into routine. As per usual, I am behind the curve, and I am shouting “Charge!” just as…